Wow!

I can't believe how fast my baby is growing up! She graduates from 8th grade tonight. I'm so proud. She's a great kid. She gets an attitude with me and it's so frustrating and hurtful sometimes, but she's been good. She's been told to stop talking in class, but has never been in trouble. She isn't a perfect student, but makes pretty good grades--mostly A's and B's. If she makes anything lower she brings it up before the next report card. She's popular and very well-liked and has a lot of friends. I don't want to pat my own back, but I think I've done a pretty good job--especially since I've done it completely alone. I think it's okay to take a big hunk of credit. She's at her friend's house right now getting ready for graduation and the dance after with a few of her inner circle. They're excited because they will all be cheerleaders together next year and now they're more inseparable than they already were! I feel for Molly's mom right now! I'll bet her house is LOUD!

I have to admit that I'm fighting tears right now. I'm proud but I'm sad. I know that the next four years are going to fly by and my baby will leave home and start her own life. I hope that she is strong and independent and goes away to a good college and then has many great adventures before she settles down with her prince and a picket fence. I just can't believe that the bulk of my job will be done. If she is everything that I want her to be she won't need me so much. She thinks she doesn't now and it's killing me.

It's been a wonderful but lonely job. I've never been any other kind of mom except a single one. Her dad has only come into her picture sporadically. He's never taken her on weekends. I only just in the past few months have been willing to leave her alone in the evenings. I've dated, but it's been hard to maintain a relationship. I've lost touch with most of my girlfriends as they are either married stay-at-home moms or single party girls. My life has pretty much revolved around being Mom. I'm trying to look forward to being alone again and "getting a life". Maybe I will do things I planned to do before I had babies. Maybe I'll find a job in Europe for a year or two or become an international flight attendant. Maybe I'll even get my own picket fence!

Just for nostalgia, here she is on her first day of kindergarten: